


Humans Are Weird

by LOTLOF



Category: Rosario + Vampire
Genre: F/M, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-21
Updated: 2013-01-21
Packaged: 2017-11-26 09:50:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/649299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LOTLOF/pseuds/LOTLOF
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As with beauty, strangeness is in the eye of the beholder.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Humans Are Weird

**Author's Note:**

> This story was originally posted by me on Fanfiction.net in 2010.
> 
> Any of you who enjoy my stories are welcome to read more of them at my website, storiesfromlotlof.com.

In my short time at Youkai Academy I learned two very important things. Neither of which had anything to do with math, science, history, or any other subject covered in a text book. Now don't get me wrong, I'm pretty smart and I was always a good enough student. It's just that school was never my priority. The important things, the things that really matter, aren't in any book. They can only be learned through real life.

The first of these lessons was to always grab with both hands when life gives you an opportunity. When the chance to get what you want most is there you have to take it.

The second thing I learned was that humans are really weird.

XXX

My name is Shirayuki Mizore and I'm a Yukki-onna; a snow maiden. I was 15 when I went to Youkai. The Academy is an interesting place. It's a school founded by monsters, run by monsters, attended by monsters, and it teaches us how to be human. Or at least how to pass for human. Its run just like a real human High School and most of the students who go there do so in order to attend a human University or to at least work in human society.

That wasn't my reason though.

XXX

I met him in my home room on my very first day there just after the opening ceremonies. He was in the seat right in front of mine. From the moment I saw him I thought he was cute.

In a scared nerdy kind of way.

"Gah!"

That was the sound he made when Nekonome-sensei mentioned the rule about killing any humans who were discovered at the school. Everyone in class was staring at him as he tried to shrink into his seat.

"Is something wrong?" Nekonome asked.

"No, nothing," he answered squeamishly.

Sensei continued and everyone looked away from him.

Except me.

XXX

"Hey," I called to him as soon as we were let out. He jumped a little and looked kind of scared. "You all right? This place isn't that bad is it?"

"Oh, ah, I'm fine," he said with a weak laugh. "I just didn't get the teacher's sense of humor is all. I actually took her jokes seriously for a minute."

"What jokes?"

"You know the whole, this is a school for monsters thing. I have to admit for a little bit I was actually scared."

I peered closely at him, even more interested than I had been. "You're human aren't you?" I asked in a low voice.

He opened his mouth to answer when there was a stir in the hallway. There was a major commotion behind us. A pretty pink haired girl had just stepped out of a different classroom and was under seige by a horde of boys. In a flash the size of the crowd around her doubled as boys from my class and others joined in to admire her.

To be honest I didn't think she was all that pretty.

"Hey! I think I know her, sort of," the boy said. His eyes were drawn to her as well. "She almost ran me over with her bike this morning."

"Uh, huh." I said. He was starting to drool. For some reason I suddenly felt really really annoyed. "So you got any plans for the rest of the day?"

His eyes came back to me. "Ah, no, not really."

"Want to go explore the campus with me?"

His face darkened a bit and he nodded. "Ah sure."

"Okay then, by the way my name is Shirayuki Mizore."

He held his hand out to me and I shook it. "I'm pleased to meet you Shirayuki-san, my name is Aono Tsukune." He glanced at my hand. "Your hand's kind of cold."

"That's all right," I told him quietly. "I warm up quickly."

When I said that he smiled at me and I got this fluttering feeling in my chest.

XXX

I didn't go to Youkai Academy to get an education or learn how to act human. I went there to find a husband. The Yukki-onna are slowly dying out as fewer and fewer of us are born in each generation. We remain fertile and able to bear children for only a few years. Not surprisingly we've become obsessed with childbirth and preserving our numbers. Our whole society is centered around that. We even have a law requiring every one of us to marry by the time we turn 17. If a snow maiden can find her own husband she is welcome to marry him. Otherwise a husband will be provided her by the village. For us love is less important than fulfilling our duty to the race as a whole. But every snow girl dreams of finding someone she can truly love.

I went to Youkai Academy hoping to fall in love. I always imagined the love of my life would be a really powerful, really handsome, really intelligent monster.

Instead I fell in love with a human. Go figure.

I still don't know what made me talk to him that first time or why I liked him. Maybe I was just able to tell somehow that we were a lot alike and that he would never ever hurt me.

Maybe I just have a thing for human boys.

Anyway we tramped all over the campus until we were both pretty tired. We found a bench by a soda machine and decided to rest a bit. He bought me an iced tea while he got himself a cola. We talked for awhile about going to school and wondering what it would be like.

As we talked we saw that pink haired girl go past. She was still in the company of a small horde of boys including a brute from our class named Saizo. As she went past she looked in our direction for just a second and I swear I saw her eyes look into Tsukune's. He blushed and I got the weird feeling that something had passed between them.

I also got this feeling that if I didn't act I might somehow lose his interest.

"Hey Tsukune," I asked. "Do you want to be my boyfriend?"

"What?!" He looked back at me and the moment with the pink haired girl abruptly ended.

"I want to be your girlfriend," I said decisively.

"Ah, we only just met," he said. "I mean I really like you Mizore and I think you're super cute. But isn't this a little quick?"

"Probably," I admitted around my lollipop. "But I've decided I like you and I don't want to take any chances. Oh, and so you know, if you agree to date me you'll also have to marry me by the time I have my 17th birthday and come live with me in my snow village."

He blinked and stared at me with his mouth hanging open. "You're joking right?"

"Nope," I said. "But if you say yes we can go to my room and start making out right now."

"Seriously?!"

"Sure."

"Okay then!" He grabbed my hand and we hurried off towards the dorms.

XXX

And with that Tsukune became my fiancé.

Of course a couple weeks later when he was nearly eaten by the Swim Team Captain, he finally realized that he really was at a school for monsters. Even though I rescued him and promised to protect him from then on, he tried to run away babbling about going home and getting away from all the scary monsters.

I tried to reason with him, but finally had to freeze and kidnap him. I brought him home with me to the village of the Yukki-onna. After my mom threatened… er, explained things to him he agreed to have the wedding ceremony a bit sooner than originally planned. Now we all live happily in the village together. I quit school of course; after all I had my husband. We should be able to start our family soon and are very happy… most of the time.

For some reason he keeps trying to sneak out of the village now and again. He also keeps saying he never really agreed to marry me.

Like I said, humans are weird.


End file.
